Author: jo

1) When you are completely convinced that the noise you are hearing MUST be made by an animal larger than a Cicada, it’s not.

2) Japanese teenagers think their school uniform is cool and wear it most of the time, even though they are expected to follow the school rules when wearing it. They even wear it nostalgically when they have left school. Odd.

3) They keep building using wood and then putting up signs saying the various dates when the building had to be rebuilt due to its total destruction after a fire. Then they let members of the public light candles inside the same buildings. Go figure.

4) Historically, the Japanese appear to have been convinced that suicide would at some point be necessary as they would be attacked and lose the battle. We haven’t visited anywhere where this actually happened, but suicide rooms sure were popular.

5) If you ride a bicycle, none of the rules for pedestrians or cars relate to you. You can ride on the pavement or on the road (with two children on your bike: generally one on a seat in front of the handlebars and one on the back). You can cycle perpendicular to a pedestrian crossing that has just gone green and be justifiably upset when you have to put a foot down to avoid killing a pedestrian. Or you can just run into them… that is fine as well. If it is sunny, you can cycle in the pedestrian bit of the pavement to be in the shade. You can go to the left or right of people after you ring your bell, whichever seems more likely to cause an accident. It is also a good idea to use your mobile as you pedal along. Oh, and never, on any account, wear a helmet unless you are cycling to a baseball game and it is the easiest way to transport your baseball helmet 😂.

6) Alcohol is a problem. We have seen middle aged ladies drinking spirits out of a bottle in a bag at 10am on a train. We have seen young people throwing up at 6pm in the evening. We have seen young people in nice clothes sleeping on the pavement at 8am in the morning. We have seen young people still drunk enough to be fighting in the street at 9.30am. More than half of all adult males on trains are drinking beer. You can buy beer from vending machines, even though the law requires you to be 20.

7) Hotels give away LOADS of free stuff. If we came again, I wouldn’t bother packing any toiletries apart from deodorant, toothpaste (only because I am fussy) and moisturizer. You can have disposable hair brushes, razors (in every room- I refer you back to my point about suicide), shampoo, conditioner, body wash, face wash, body scrubbing cloths, cotton wool buds, hair bobbles, cotton wool pads, toothbrushes and toothpaste. Every hotel has left yukatas out for us to use as well (Good left over right otherwise you are declaring yourself a ghost!), so you can save your clothes for outside the hotel and not bother with pyjamas.

8) There are hardly any children’s playparks. I reckon we have seen fewer than 10 in the whole trip. Perhaps this is a symptom of the aging population, or perhaps parents go back to work, the children go to day care and no-one goes to the park.

9) Work is everything. Everyone in Japan that has found out how long we have been away for has told us that they would be sacked if they took that much time off. No wonder there aren’t many kids!

10) It seems to be normal to work ridiculously long hours and then go out drinking with colleagues or customers. City dwellers do not seem to have a great quality of life, with little holiday or free time and work being the main focus.

11) Which leads me on to my next point. I expected all Japanese people to be scrupulously polite. I don’t know why. Anyway they’re not. Big cities here are just like London: no-one waits for you to get off the train, everyone pushes to get on escalators. Everyone in the service industry all over the country behaves how I expected the whole population would. Nothing is too much trouble and there is a lot of bowing and politeness particles.

12) Japanese health and safety is bonkers. They have barriers on train platforms with doors that open seconds before the train doors so you can’t accidentally fall under the trains (or deliberately I presume). We have seen up to four uniformed men managing pedestrian traffic when a car emerges from an underground car park. Anywhere there is building works, they have safety marshalls who stand in full heavy duty uniform (sometimes in direct sun) making sure no-one enters a restricted area.

On the other hand, they mix electricity and water in every bathroom. Craziness.

13) At home, we herald announcements with two tone “bing-bongs”. In Japan they play little tunes every time underground train doors open, or a train is due to arrive at a platform, or you have reached the top of bottom of a set of stairs or escalator. In Tokyo, each line of the underground plays a different tune, so you can tell which train you are getting onto.

14) Japanese scenery is beautiful and dramatic, but also ascetic. You have essentially four choices: Buildings, “rice growing fields”, trees or water. If it has trees on it, it is really steep, if it is flat it could be any of the other three! Now you can draw your own Japanese scene.

15) Japanese houses were taxed based on the width it takes up on the road. So old buildings are very narrow.

16) Some of the best restaurants we have been to have been in high rise buildings with nondescript frontage and really dodgy stairs or lifts. The best one had a lift all taped up with plastic, ready for the murder scene out of Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (if you haven’t seen it… graphic British comedy).

A very early start led us to our most traumatic journey in Japan. The driver of the Green Tomato airport link was very very tired. I am grateful for the accident that slowed the motorwat to a standstill admit forced him to come off and wake up a bit. He was weaving, braking at the last minute and blinking frantically. Not reassuring behaviour.

The other bonus (apart from not dying horribly) was that we got a crazy back street tour of a bit more of Japan, the highlight of which was the driver pointing out of the window and saying “rice growing fields” as if this was news. Cue slightly hysterical giggling.

Keith and one of the other passengers were desperate for a wee by the time we got to the airport and it had taken so much longer than scheduled that we had to arrange drop off by when our planes left. We were last and still had plenty of time- but there was running for the toilet!

Our flight had been delayed by just over an hour so we spent our last yen on some souvenirs and presents and then went to the gate.

The flight was long and dull but fairly uneventful. We were disappointed but not surprised to see a large pile of clouds where Mount Fuji was alleged to be. It is the wrong time of year to be mountain spotting and apart from a speck in the distance from the top of the Skytree we have not been lucky.

The children can not countenance sleep when watching films is an option so they were square eyed and exhausted by the time we got to Amsterdam. Our late flight had meant a missed connection and now we faced a 5 hour wait for the hour flight back to Manchester. The children had been awake for about 19 hours by this point and they were entirely beyond reason. We tried food- which worked briefly, and lying down on loungers- which allowed Danny to get about an hour. The inevitable safety announcements woke Mila every time she dropped off and caused much upset (understandably as it was very frustrating).

The flight to Manchester was very full and there was a late party of young Dutch men in 2018 Liverpool t-shirts carrying 8 packs of Jagermeister. This did not fill me with hope for a peaceful flight, but in the end nothing kept me awake and I happily snored through the 45 minutes we sat on the tarmac while they retrieved the suitcases of the people who had failed to make the flight. Then I snored through the entire flight, not even stirring for free food.

I believe Keith did the same but the kids stayed up again (1 on either side of me), choosing reading this time over sleep.

Keith’s Dad kindly collected us from the airport and whizzed us home.

Our last job was to unpack the suitcases as they had got very wet sitting on the tarmac in Amsterdam and then collapse. The adventure of a life time was over and we were finally allowed to go to bed!!

So many rude Italians. They can’t queue, they shout while they are eating and they do not act appropriately in a temple.

I feel better for getting that off my chest.

Breakfast was the same as yesterday and I had to bribe the children with promises of coffee shop cake to get then to eat their rice.

It was also as noisy as yesterday’s tea. Because of the aforementioned Italians.

The coffee shop wasn’t open yet so we went for a little walk first. We were going to be stuck on a bus or train all day, so some fresh air first thing seemed sensible. Cemetary time (again!!). This time it was cloudy/misty and it looked quite eerie….time for some more photos!

The coffee shop produced delicious cake and coffee for the price of a liver and two kidneys. Daylight robbery. But tasty.

While we drank our tea and coffee (made from ground diamonds and sprinkled with gold leaf) we got chatting to the tourists sitting next to us. It transpired that although they were Italians, they were quite nice. Probably because they had relatives living in Leeds, and weren’t part of the coach trip.

After our second breakfast, we collected our bags and checked out of the temple accomodation. I wrote a quick postcard to our lovely, lovely hosts at the Watanabe ryokan and then we hopped on the bus back to the station. It was busy and once we had got on we realised that we would have to be crafty. Our two day bus tickets had run out the day before. I sneakily covered up the date as we got off and the bus driver didn’t notice. Phew! My assumption was that we had paid for the journey in both directions, we just hadn’t validated the return part which would have covered the bus bit as well. Anyway, we pulled it off!

The return trip to Osaka was much the same: beautiful, crazy views with many, many trees, except Mila felt travel sick. She did exactly the right thing: she lay down on the bench seat on the train and went to sleep. When she woke up she felt much better.

Obviously, as she is a pre-teen, she wouldn’t take any hard won advice from her mother like: suck a polo, eat something, have a drink of water and all such suggestions were met with the utter disdain they deserved. I perceive the next few years are going to have their own unique set of challenges. And my mother is going to enjoy every minute. I believe she calls it payback.

We had to keep changing trains and buying more food as we were all starving, but the journey was largely uneventful and allowed me to read my book in relative peace. Keith sat next to me watching The Grand Tour and shaking with laughter.

Mila didn’t even realise we had arrived when we came out of the station at Shinawa station. She asked me which train we were getting on next!

The hotel was easy to find (follow the big flashing arrows to the red light district, which is not nearly as subtle as in Soho!) and look behind the Godzilla climbing down a building.

It was lovely inside and the rooms were nice but the configuration made life tricky. The kids were on floor 24 and we were on floor 19 (up different elevators from the hotel reception on floor 8). We decided it was only one night and they could always phone us if there was a problem but I think it made us all a little anxious.

I had successfully requested the hotel to book us a fancy bbq restaurant for tea by email. They had emailed me confirmation and printed out directions for when we arrived. That’s what I call service!

The restaurant was epic. I think places in the UK should adopt the practice of little blinds that can be pulled down between tables to give you some privacy.

Each table had a gas burner sunk into it with a griddle on top. The menu was in English but still almost incomprehensible. Our excitement was limitless when we realised that there was a vegetable selection!!!

We ordered pork, chicken and some of the cheaper beef cuts (the most expensive works out as about £200 a portion… and frankly the kids said it looked fatty!!), two salads and the veg for barbequeing.

The benefit of this type of restaurant is that you don’t have to wait very long to be served as it is all given to you raw. The downside is you have to keep the tongs away from the pyromaniacs in the family and try and make them wait until the chicken is cooked!

The food was delicious and I particularly enjoyed wearing the little bibs they gave you to protect you clothes from the sizzling fat. Very classy.

To give you an idea of how precious vegetables are in Japan: it was the same price for a bowl of courgette, onions, mushroom and sweet potato (about 4-6 pieces of each) as the plate full of bits of chicken thigh. The tomato salad was lettuce and a bit of grated carrot with a whole peeled tomato in the middle cut into 8 pieces. No-one can be able to afford to eat 7 pieces of veg a day here unless they grow their own. We are all craving apples and the only oranges we have seen were on an offering plate in a temple. I had to restrain the children. Bananas on breakfast buffets are cut in half.

Right, rant over.

When we had eaten our free ice cream (vanilla and matcha) we paid and headed to our next appointment for the evening… not karaoke as my family are all to repressed (actually we were all exhausted and I didn’t even bother suggesting it), but a quick trip to the underground to cash in the Pasmo cards and then a trip to make an offering of our own at the temple of stationery: Muji!!

Pure bliss. The kids had a budget, but I just bought random stuff.

After that we negotiated the drunken masses who fancied a bit of “how’s your father” in one of the many dubious establishments, and the invitations to the type of party you don’t take your children to and made it back to the hotel. We washed the children and put them to bed with the bare minimum in their rooms so we could get them up quickly in the morning. Then we repacked again.

Keith was not at all sure the cases would make it from Miyajima, but the system worked like clockwork and we didn’t even have to ask the hotel for them: they were just produced like magic.

Packing done, final photos taken of the view out of the window and alarm set for 5.15am we settled down to our last sleep in Japan.

This morning Keith and I got up for the Otsutome (Buddhist service) at 6.30am. Unsurprisingly the children did not wake up.

The service took place in the temple and was well attended by tourists. 3 monks led the service, with one obviously in charge. For nearly 30 minutes they chanted continuously with one covering the breaths of the other and joining back in as soon as they had breathed. I was very impressed with their breath control which told of much practice They used gongs and cymbals as well. At one point, the congregation were invited to come forward to pray for their ancestors.

At the back of the temple on the left, a younger monk held a book up and mouthed the words to the chants for the entire ceremony. His arms must have ached by the end.

We learnt last night that many of the monks are temple children. This means their dad is a married monk and they are expected (if they want to) to leave home to train and then return to take over the duties of their father in the temple he runs. I am not sure their definition of a monk gels completely with ours – these monks drink beer, can get married and generally seem to have a pretty relaxed time!

After the service, we went to another small temple for a fire ceremony. This is where the small and thin pieces of wood that people write their prayers on get burnt ceremonially. This occasion was rammed because the building was so much smaller.

As the burning and drum banging continued (I am glad that I only had one beer last night), the building filled with smoke from the top down and our clothes and hair absorbed all the woody smoke smell.

I loved the way they built the fire: supports across the top of the bowl with struts across that. Then they piled a massive number of prayer sticks on top and added oil and sprinkles to the conflagration. The ideal job for a pyromaniac! I was jealous of the burning job but not the drum banging job. He chanted and banged solidly for 30 minutes. It is a good job that it is cooler up here. It looked exhausting.

At the end of the ceremony, the congregation were invited to stand up and waft the smoke at themselves. Keith’s entire head was engulfed by the layer of smoke covering the ceiling so we didn’t bother wafting extra.

The monk in charge said thanks for coming and various other stuff in Japanese at the end of each ceremony. This took about 2-3 minutes, then he asked everyone to stand up in English. It was comical for some reason, as if all the Japanese he had spoken could be translated into three English words.

Our room was within 6 feet of the back of the fire ceremony temple and yet our precious moppets had managed to sleep through the whole thing! We roused them ever so gently (by throwing open the outside doors and taking photos of them in their pits) and got them up for breakfast. There was some confusion about where we should be…. when I sent to check I was told to wait in our room, but when the monk came to fetch us 40 minutes later, he asked why we weren’t in breakfast. Anyway it was cold so it didn’t really matter and mostly inedible to the children. Keith and I are now up to eating anything (vegetarian) anyway.

Our plan for the day was not complex. We wanted to go back to the cemetery we walked around last night in the day and watch the 10.30am meal offering for Koba Daishi. We set off after doing a bit of washing ( I did get a bit of help with how to use the machine but it was very straightforward) and getting Mila’s book inscribed, and then wandered into the graveyard.

This might sound a bit macabre, but it doesn’t have the feeling of a graveyard like we are used to. That might be because I can’t read any of the inscriptions of eulogies, but it feels very calming and peaceful. Oh and there are about 400,000 souls laid at rest there!

It was a little bit busy, but not as bad as I had expected. We think that most people only stay here for one night and as they have to check out at 10am, a lot of them had already gone.

We got to watch the food offering and stayed for the beginning of the service, but then we went to look at the building where they keep the spare lanterns. Your are absolutely NOT allowed to take photos. My husband is not good at following rules… as you all know. Thus the photos. [EDIT Keith: I can’t read Japanese warnings not to take photos, even the symbols of cameras with a red cross through – these are obviously Japanese script of some kind, note to self – must learn Japanese writing…]

It is an amazing place when you consider that the smallest lantern costs 100,000 Yen (about £700), a lot of money has been paid by believers to have their ancestors prayed for. It is also absolutely beautiful. Each lamp has the message etched onto the metal and the light inside (thank God it is electric so little risk of fire) shines through it making the most beautiful patterns. Of course, to the Japanese it is just writing, but to me it is beautiful. I can still only read about 10 Hiragana letters, so I am quite a way off being able to work out what any of them say.

When Keith had taken a thousand photos and the kids had skipped about and washed many statues (you can ask them why!) we hopped on a bus to the other end of town. This is the historical area, although the town has apparently had no less than 5 lightening strikes and burnt down almost entirely.

Now, if I was a religious person and the place I lived and worked kept burning down in what can only be considered an act of God, I might decide to move. Apparently that has not occurred to any of the people living here as they keep rebuilding. It must just be me.

We then visited the main temple of Esoteric Buddhism: Kongobuji , which has the biggest rock garden (raked gravel) in Japan and gives out sweet rice cakes and green tea. Mila got another stamp in her collectors book and Danny raced around, making the most of the cooler weather that means he can run about like a luatic as he normally does.

There is a character on signs and posters everywhere in Koyasan and his name is written in Hiragana. I decided to use my new found skills (and Google) to work out what he was called. I managed 4 out of 6 characters and then had to stop a Japanese couple to ask about the last one. It turned out that my bloody chart had more than one page and I was nowhere near as far through the learning process as I had hoped. Anyway, I did end up with the characters name:

Ko u ya ku n.

After I had recovered from using so much of my brain power, we had our free snack and saw Nobu doing a tour. He recognised us and said hello which made Danny very happy.

We also went to Danjo Garan which houses a number of temples and old buildings. There was one (with only a Japanese explanation, so I have no idea what it was) that had a kind of rotating belt around it with handles. The children, and some other small people, got behind the handles and pushed it around. All the Japanese adults smiled approvingly so it must have been the correct thing to do. We may never know why. Mila suggested it was a coffee grinder?! Another temple had coins balanced on their edges and the children pestered me to help them balance one. Again, no idea why!!

After an insubstantial breakfast (even for those of us who actually ate it!), we were all hungry, so Keith broke the habit of a lifetime and let us go into the first restaurant that we saw to feast on katsu curry and pork escalope. We all wanted meat! It was yummy and filled the children’s tummies with recognisable food. The gentleman who took our money at the end of the meal spoke excellent, if old fashioned English.

While we were waiting for our food, Mila decided to rest her chin on Keith’s hand as she had run out of energy. Then she randomly started singing “amazing face….” to the tune of the hymn. We literally have no idea what she is going to do next.

My favourite outfit of the day was a man in a t-shirt with a zebra motif paired with stripy trousers. I don’t even think it was deliberate. Classy nonetheless.

It is at least 10 degrees cooler in the mountains and it has been so nice to walk around and not be constantly planning where we can buy more liquid and how we can get into air conditioning… which is a good thing as the temple doesn’t have any.

Apparently, I am not the only one looking forward to getting back to their own bed. Today we saw an entire family asleep on a bench outside the FamilyMart. The little boy was spreadeagled on his dad’s chest and the mum was collapsed sideways on the suitcase. I am guessing they had a bad night.

We bought some water and mid afternoon snacks and then made our way back to the temple lodging for a rest. We had planned to get the bus, but the timings were such that it was easier to walk and we ended up with a quick, free look in a local art gallery where they gave us a present.

Mila managed to drop her chewing gum on the floor while panicking about a gigantic ant that was scurrying around on her leg, but otherwise the afternoon was quite relaxed. Only normal levels of bickering were experienced.

I took myself off to the meditation again but didn’t manage to get into the zone as successfully today. I will have to practice when I get home, even if I can never get my legs into that position.

Tea was mostly edible again although uninspiring. I don’t like cold tempura and the nasty goma-dofu (very smooth sesame seed tofu) is not going to make it onto my favourite food list. [EDIT Keith: It’s like congealed cat sick]

It was an entertaining meal, as on the other side of the paper screen was a coach load (I am not exaggerating as I saw the coach!) of Italians. They were very noisy and made very odd noises as they ate. The monks brought their beers in long handled milk carriers and there were plenty of trips.

The poached and peeled figs were my favourite and I got two as Mila didn’t like hers. We are still all having problems with the texture of some things. And why they feel it necessary to dip pears in salt water, I will never understand. Every time the poor children think they are going to get some fruit, they have messed with it in some critical way: pickling or salting it. Just no need.

Keith and I went back to the cemetery at dusk to try and catch a glimpse of the elusive squirrels. It was very quiet and it was a pleasant walk to the end and back. We didn’t see a squirrel fly, but we did hear the noisiest cicadas so far (apparently they only live for one day as they use up so much energy making all that racket).

On the way back it was mostly dark and we heard the squirrels chattering and saw one moving about in the trees high above our heads. I was satisfied with that as a sighting so I finally let Keith head back to the temple.

Our last day of sightseeing is done. Now we just have to travel over 500km back to Tokyo tomorrow to catch our flight home.

Random Japanese fact. All train stations in Tokyo’s underground line play a different jingle each time a train arrives and leaves. In the middle of the night there was a random tune outside the hotel. In my head it was accompanied with an impending earthquake announcement in the calm male Japanese voice used on every platform.

At the bottom or top of every staircase there is a jungle noise: birds tweeting. We think it is for visually impaired people, but it is quite relaxing none the less.

A quick Mystays breakfast in a freezing room got us ready for our day with the only exciting bit being that the apple juice was actually oolong tea.

Being the gurus of public transport that we are really helped with today’s epic journey. The first bit of the journey was fairly straightforward but converting the Nankai rail passes to tickets was not intuitive! Not only did we manage but then we also worked out that the extra vouchers were our seat reservations and passed on our hard won knowledge to a poor confused German couple sitting in our seats on the train!

The first bit of the Nanken railway felt quite normal: rice paddies and houses and shops flashed past, but then the gradient changed, the train slowed and the views became spectacular. Immense gorges dropped to one side whilst steep inclines rose the other. Tunnels were frequent and after a while the double track dropped to single with passing places. You cannot help but marvel at the engineering that made this train line possible. The gradient is way above what must be ideal and the crest on which the railway is built feels too narrow to be secure. I couldn’t recommend it to someone who was afraid of heights.

The station at the end of the line feels pretty high… until you see the funicular you are about to get on stretching up the mountain to your right. The angle at the bottom is not as severe as it is further up, so when you get on, the whole car is leaning in towards the mountain. It was quite disconcerting. The ride was very smooth; including the passing place where the other car meets you going down, until you get to the top and you slow right down and bounce just a little before you stop. Not a nice feeling.

Tim’s instructions for our trip have been fantastic and have displayed knowledge you could only get by experiencing this place. However… today didn’t quite work like that. We got on a bus as instructed by the guide according to Keith, only for me to find a different bus on another page. Take note Tim, you don’t want the Daimon bus!! Confusion ensued, but the bus organiser found us a map and drew on the stop we needed to get off at and where our temple was. We had been on the wrong one (it had lots of spare seats!) and of course the one we needed to be on was packed.

Once we had sorted that out the rest was easy and we successfully navigated the streets to our temple.

There is nothing here really apart from many temples, the odd restaurant and tourist shop and lots of trees. It is perfect for winding down after our hectic schedule over the last few weeks.

We went and got udon noodles for lunch, had a little wander around a couple of temples and then went back to our room for a lie down. The children read and watched YouTube and Keith and I both had a snooze.

At 4.30pm we went to the meditation hall for our initiation into Ajikan meditation. It wasn’t very comfortable having my legs all twisted round each other but I found it very relaxing. I am not sure that the rest of the family derived much benefit but I kept my eyes firmly (and incorrectly!) shut so I couldn’t see any messing about. Keith tells me he did it properly, but was distracted by someone making noise nearby – he said it sounded like a Spanish couple arguing….not ideal for meditation!

Supper was served shortly after meditation in a dining room in the main building. I think most people get their food in their room, but I don’t think they can fit it in when there are four of you. The food was as expected and Keith and I ate all but one noodle dish. There is something quite reassuring about knowing it can’t be offal! Nothing was explained though so I have no idea what we ate. The kids were not as keen and will be desperate for breakfast in the morning. I fear that might be the same as we had for tea!

We went in the Onsen after tea and got ready for our night walk. The registration process was somewhat painful and while we were waiting to leave, we played the ‘how long can you stand on one leg for’ game. Keith waited until I had won twice before challenging me to a game. My legs were too tired and he fell over so Mila won. She screamed her victory at the top of her lungs and made nearly 100 people stop talking and stare at her. Oops.

Nobu was our tour guide for the cemetery night walk. He told us that there are over 200,000 tombs and up to 300,000 other bodies interred in the grounds. The enormous fir trees are Japanese cedar and have an average age of 200-600 years. They are protected by the government.

Every day, monks make two meals for Kobo-Daishi (the founder of the village we were staying in) at 6am and 10.30am and take them to his mausoleum. The Shingon esoteric Buddhists believe that he is still sitting in there meditating where he has been for 1,200 years and one day he will emerge… enlightened. 30 years after he shut himself inside at 62 years old, a monk opened the doors and saw him still sitting there. He shaved his beard and cut his hair and gave him new clothes. Then he shut the doors again. Since then, only the head monk of the graveyard has been into the building and he hasn’t reported any change so they still make the food every day.

[Keith edit: if they all ate a proper meal with carbs and meat perhaps they’d stop seeing a living monk who is 1,200 years old….just saying….]

We heard the chatter of flying squirrels, saw a little frog and a massive spider on the path and wandered through the spooky graveyard for nearly two hours. Nobu told us some spooky stories about dying within 3 years if you trip up the stairs or if you can’t see your reflection in the well. We will walk carefully when we got back to check in daylight tomorrow!

The children were hilarious with the guide. They walked with him for the whole time and pestered him with questions about flying squirrels and tombs and where he had lived in the UK (Manchester for 18 months doing a course in English and the psychological effects of music). I think they need to go back to school! When we got back, Danny told me how much he liked Nobu about 4 times. Bless. Of course it could just be that they are both sick of us and are desperate for a conversation with anyone else in English!!

Nobu showed us a very typical grave decoration that used Gorinto- the 5 elements from which everything is made. This is represented on almost all of the tombs: earth, water, fire, wind and space. Just add consciousness to make people, animals, vegetables and insects. He told us that anyone can be buried here, from any religion and any country, as long as they believe in the teachings of Kobo-Daishi.

As we were finishing our walk, by the lantern temple, Nobu became slightly more philosophical. He told us that even though lotus plants grow in mud and dirt, they are strong and beautiful. He said our lives should be like the lotus. Then he chanted a mantra and asked us to wish for something. The other tour guide (who did his in Japanese) joined in the chant and it was very evocative.

Our final fact of the evening was that the little fat Buddha who wears a red bib and/or a little hat looks after babies and is called Jiza. Pregnant women pray to him, as do people who have lost a baby. If someone dies unexpectedly- say in a traffic accident, people tend to put a Jiza statue at the side of the road as that is the Buddha who takes people from this world to the death world and makes sure their spirits don’t get lost.

A fascinating evening, but I will have to go back tomorrow as I want to see a flying squirrel!

Most exciting thing to happen today… The temperature is 23 degrees. Epic.

This morning we had to leave the lovely, lovely man; the lovely, lovely lady and the lovely, lovely Ryokan. We are all a bit sad. The lovely, lovely man gave us another lift to the port and stood waving by the car until we had gone into the building. He was possibly ensuring that we had actually gone, but it felt very friendly.

They had got up extra early to make our delicious breakfast and cool the car down for us. Keith did his packing trick again (my packing trick is to stay out of the way as much as possible and then demand things he has already hidden…) and we arranged for the bags to be sent straight to Tokyo.

So, we had done the car bit and the ferry bit. Next we hopped on the local train to the Shinkansen station at Hiroshima and caught our bullet train. This one felt a little tired inside but it went just as fast so we didn’t mind. It is a slightly different experience when you don’t have reserved seats, but within 1 stop we were all sitting together.

About a third of the way along the route, Keith drew my attention to a massive castle we could see out of the window. It transpired that this was Himeji Castle, the biggest in Japan – one we were not scheduled to visit. We continued to speed along, but it was niggling at Keith. We both had a look at the stuff to do in Osaka (sorry Osaka) and decided that we would prefer to see Himeji Castle.

We dropped off the bags at the hotel and then hopped back on the Shinkansen with a picnic lunch (can you guess which meal went to which person?) to Himeji. It was so humid today that an extra few hours in air conditioning was no punishment and the castle in a thunder storm was awesome!

[Keith edit: Jo misses out how we got from the hotel to the Shinkansen. To do this, you have to get on a local train at Osaka and then pick up the Shinkansen from Shin-Osaka. We arrived at Osaka (not as much English signage as in other cities) and there was a train at one of the platforms. Nothing obvious to say it was the right train….so I shoved everyone on it. Much to Jo’s surprise we arrived at Shin-Osaka 5 minutes later. She was panicking. I was sure it would be the right train.]

It was very straightforward to get to the castle as there was an excellent lady in the tourist information who spoke excellent English and told us exactly which bus to get on and from where.

[Keith edit: Two note-worthy points about the castle. Firstly, ninjas did actually live here, unlike other places we’ve visited, like the Ninja Temple in Kanazawa, where locals pretend they lived there for tourists. Ninjas were a lower caste of warrior. Secondly, the ninja training camp scene in the James Bond movie You Only Live Twice was filmed at Himeji Castle. If you’ve seen the film you’ll no doubt remember Sean Connery’s appalling rendition of a Japanese person, with hair black and slicked down, and some rather dodgy makeup.]

The sky had darkened by the time we got to the castle and the heat was oppressive. We had an impassioned discussion about whether or not it was hotter/ more humid than it had been in recent days.

Mila went to get Keith a melon soda on the way into the castle and managed to press the wrong button. We all shared the resulting peach stuff that came out and Keith didn’t sulk too much, he just muttered for a bit!

The castle was amazing and showed the 1.2 billion Yen that they have just spent on it was probably worth it. I read a hilarious review on TripAdvisor by an American gentleman that complained it was empty and they really ought to put some more stuff in it.

Keith took some great photos as we climbed the levels and looking out of the window on the 4th floor revealed that it was raining heavily. Mila completed the journey to the top at break neck speed and then went straight back down to stand in the rain. When the rest of us made it down, it was to a very dejected little face. The rain had stopped by the time she got out and she had missed it. Poor baby!!

The temperature had dropped massively when we came out and the air felt clearer. In actual fact the pressure had probably dropped as well. We got a few more fat drops of rain and then the thunder and lightning started. It was right behind the castle from our vantage point but Keith didn’t quite manage to catch it on camera. Disappointing really. The children screamed when the lightening flashed and got looked at by all the sensible tourists.

It was well worth the journey back the way we had come to see the castle and the reduced temperature for a few hours was a much appreciated bonus.

Not having seat reservations was no problem and our Shinkansen back to Osaka was even quicker (for some inexplicable reason). I found a restaurant with good reviews in the Dotonbori district and Google Maps took us there very efficiently. I cannot cope with walking the wrong way so Keith has to drive it, but I can plan the routes!!

The restaurant was only just open and no-one else was there yet but we bravely went in. The English spoken by the waiter was not excellent but the English menu seemed comprehensive…. until we started ordering and he kept saying old… no more… at us. Then we had to look at the new menu (only in Japanese) and try to match the pictures from the old one. A little cranial challenge just increased our appetites!

The food was good. Who knew there would be a cover charge for vegetables? I mean we were excited to see vegetables but we thought it was a dish we had ordered accidentally. My only concern was that the chicken wings were not chicken. The bones looked wrong somehow. No?

Keith and I had lemon sours. They had gin in them and were strong. Caroline would have liked it…

The area of Dotonbori is crazy. It is all lit up and is the essence of weird Japan. There was even a kind of Ferris wheel inside a building. Mila was desperate to go up but the rest of us thought she was crazy and wouldn’t join in.

We had a little wander about the craziness and found epic waffle cup icecreams for pudding. I am a bad person as I failed to read the sign IN ENGLISH that told me the server was visually impaired. I tried my usual trick of pointing to the menu and saying “are o kudasai” which didn’t work. Argh….. we worked it out eventually, got the ice creams and then we headed back to our trusty MyStay for a well earned rest.

My bruise… for posterity:

… which has been knocked with a camera, tapped, bumped into and generally abused all day. Grrr.

We had ordered western style breakfasts for the children, so they were offered coffee. The nice man must have seen our faces as he took pity on us and let us have coffee as well as our Japanese tea. It was epic. Both breakfasts were delicious and swiftly polished off.

When we went back up to the room to get ready, Keith made a funny noise. He had unearthed a massive insect in the corner of the room and did not look happy. We sent the children downstairs wih a picture of it on Keith’s mobile to get reinforcements. The nice man appeared moments later with his bug removal equipment. First he squished it. Then he used tweezers to collect it and take it away. No drama so it must be normal. It was massive though – probably a cockroach, based on previous encounters in Florida.

The lovely, lovely bug removing expert then gave us a lift to the port to catch the fast ferry to Hiroshima Peace park. This saved us a 20 minute walk, sweatiness and much moaning. Lovely man.

We were in plenty of time and got to watch and count in the 19 motorbikes lining up to get on the normal ferry to the mainland. I didn’t fancy the leather but I did enjoy the small Japanese child counting them in.

On yesterday’s ferry I spotted some rafts in the strait. Today’s ferry had useful information that popped up on the screen. They are oyster rafts and have ropes hanging underneath them to farm oysters. I wonder how much damage the tropical storm did to them last week? We saw at least one washed up on the beach.

The express ferry (well, large speed boat) had quite a turn of speed and on a mirror flat sea we went really fast. The bow lifted right up in the water and slammed into the bow waves from other boats with quite some force. It was Mila’s turn to be scared today and she hid for quite a lot of the journey.

We saw an emerging cormorant (who looked very surprised to see us) as we turned into the river and cruised up through the city to the Peace Park. Much of the information on the boat’s screen was now about the bridges we passed under and when they had been built or rebuilt.

What we were planning to do today started to become a bit more real first thing when our hosts were startled that we were taking the kids. I don’t think we could have come here and not seen it and we can’t pretend it didn’t happen and that the world is a nice place all the time.

Our first stop when we got off the boat was the Atomic bomb dome. This is a building so close to the detonation that the force was downwards and not outwards, so the stone structure survived. It has been fitted with sub-structure to preserve it in this state as a reminder of the destruction.

Right next to this memorial was a man talking to some tourists. He had a hand cart with him full of folders in every language of his experience. He was an “in-utero survivor”, in other words his pregnant mother was in Hiroshima when the bomb was detonated. The folder detailed his health problems and his mother’s and his perspective on what had happened. I expected vitriol and anger. I didn’t expect to find out that there were 7 years of press suppression and that it wasn’t until Japan had their sovereignty back nearly 20 years later that survivors could expect financial and medical aid. I didn’t expect that he would feel no aggression towards the US or that we would fully recognise the impact of Japan’s behaviour in the Pacific. I didn’t know that 1,000 Japanese leaders were executed. I didn’t know that all of this happened because Japan was desperate for resources that they didn’t have.

A shocking introduction to this place and rightly so. We took a moment to reflect.

My godmother would have been proud of me today for dragging my family around two art galleries. I had no idea that European Renaissance art was so well represented in Japan. The artists listed below are some of the works we have seen today (minor it has to be said but still…).

Van Gogh, Signac, Seurat, Toulouse-Lautrec, Rosseau, Munch, Gaugin, Cezanne, Bombard, Le Sidaner, Matisse, Picasso, Leger, Monet, Manet, Delacroix, Courbett, Renoir, Degas.

Photos are Picasso and Matisse.

We decided that all tourist venues we visit from now on will be judged on the following criteria:

1) quality of air conditioning

2) number of places to sit

3) vouchers for money off in the cafe.

You will notice that content no longer features!! We are simple creatures. Anyway, today’s first gallery (Hiroshima Gallery of Art) scored very highly on all criteria and led us to partake of a sweet bun, some cherry cake, a cold chocolate milk and an elderflower soda. The only downside was the vicious, bruise causing toilet door. Photos tomorrow probably when it comes out in all of its splendour!

Our next stop was via the street cars. We had to negotiate being in the middle of the road to catch one, but once you had dodged the cars it was just like a bus. Again we could use our Pasmo cards to hop on and off.

We made it to the Shuikeien Gardens surrounding the Prefectural Art Museum. They are beautiful and the ponds were full of enormous healthy looking carp and dinky terrapins. This is the park with the only tree that survived the atomic bomb. It’s seeds have been sent all around the world as envoys of peace. It now grows at an able of about 45 degrees due to the force of the bomb.

We managed to pick a different route through from the children, so when Keith sorted the photos that evening, it was to discover that Amelia had taken a number of pictures of a pigeon sitting on a bridge with a wide angle lens that made it tiny!

We came across a Japanese couple feeding the carp with the pellets sold in the park. The gentleman very kindly gave both kids a handful so that they could try and target the small, weak ones that kept being pushed out of the way by the big ones.

I felt we had exhausted the activity of watching fish (and none of the important criteria were being fulfilled) so we went into the Prefectural Art Museum. There was a special exhibition of children’s cartoons so it was heaving with toddlers queuing badly. We didn’t bother with that bit and just went around the standard exhibition.

We particularly liked the enormous Dali and the Hashimoto: dragon and tiger in quarrel! As you can see Danny couldn’t keep his hands off what is, we think, a pretty important painting in art circles.

After that cooling interlude we went off to get some lunch- more of the yummy pancake, omelette, cabbage, bacon, bean sprouts and bbq sauce (okonmiyaki). It seemed like a bit of a dodgy shop but the food was excellent.

Our final stop was the Peace park.

First we went to an underground cenotaph that listed the names and showed the photos of those people they know to have died. Because the records of who lived in the area were all stored locally, they were destroyed. Exact numbers will never be known. Visitors are encouraged to add names and upload photos to make the list more complete. It seems so sad that there must be so many “unnamed warriors” still unaccounted for.

The main museum is being reinforced to better withstand earthquakes, so the main exhibition has been moved to a side hall. It was absolutely rammed with people. Tomorrow is the 73rd anniversary and a big commemoration is planned.

The first display was a chronological history of the development of nuclear weapons and the reasons for that. It explained the pressure that countries were put under and the race not to be last.

The displays were 4 or 5 people deep and you had to dodge between them to read the English. The benefit of this was that the children didn’t see most of it. We gave them the general impresion without the specific detail.

In the second exhibition, survivors had donated items of clothing that victims had been wearing or possessions they had loved. Each item had a description of how the owner had died. All were filthy, some covered in blood. Most were charred.

A lot of the items were donated by the mothers of children who had died. One explained how she kept going back into the city to try and find her missing child and having to go back to bed every night without having found hem. Very emotional. And of course she would have gone anyway, but no-one had told her that by going into the area worst affected, she would receive a fatal dose of radiation herself.

The most harrowing section was that of photographs taken of injuries. I don’t think the children noticed them fortunately as they were very graphic.

I didn’t expect to be told that survivors were shunned by Japanese society as though they had something that could be infectious. I didn’t realise that the people affected didn’t know why they got ill and died of complications after they had recovered from hideous burns and injuries caused by flying debris.

Our return ferry was approaching so we walked back through the preparations for tomorrow’s commemoration. There must have been 1,000 seats placed under tents and awnings in front of the Cenotaph.

We were all a bit quiet on the way back and the sea was much choppier so cuddles seemed appropriate.

The lovely man collected us from the port and the children went into the Ryokan for their showers. Keith and I walked up to the massive temple right next to our lodgings. It was shut for the night and the staff were tidying and watering the plants. We squeezed in anyway for a look and rang the bell which had a big hammer you could swing back.

A quick shower before our last Kiseiki supper and then sleeping.

After another picnic breakfast, requiring minimal washing up…

… we headed off to our tea ceremony. We left plenty of time… or so we thought. Of course there is always something. Today it was that if you don’t swipe your Pasmo properly when coming out of a train line, you can’t get into the next one. This necessitated a return trip within a station so that we could carry on with our journey. Danny’s enthusiasm/lack of swiping accuracy made us slightly late, but as we weren’t last it didn’t matter and our host didn’t seem to mind.

The session started with our lovely host establishing where we were all from. There were two 4 person British families (including us), one young Italian couple (young enough to be asked to kneel on the floor!!) and one American mother and daughter in kimono.

We were taught how to bow- the four children got a private lesson. The most important part was the distance between the edge of the tatami mat and their knees- sixteen stitches.

Then the Italian couple demonstrated how to receive the tea, apologise for drinking theirs before we got ours, thank the host for making it, etc. The lovely host was labouring under the impression that we were all capable of remembering a multi-word phrase in Japanese. None of us were. Well, apart from the younger American lady who had cheated by learning some Japanese in advance! Clearly all Americans are highly tolerant of foreign cultures.

The host was lovely and only got slightly serious for the formal part of the ceremony. The rest of the time she happily laughed at us trying to eat our sweets with a little wooden stick and Keith’s face trying to drink green tea! [EDIT Keith: It was revolting. Think a lurid green frothy liquid, that should probably have a HAZMAT label attached to it. In fact it would make an ideal base paint for some of my models.]

After we had all tried the tea formally with the right phrases in the right places (although it should be pointed out that we did not

a) have white socks on

b) have a little fan to tuck into our kimono

c) remember any of the proper phrases!),

she invited all of the children and one person from each of the couples to make their own tea. The children then let their parents drink the tea they had made. Yay! Danny made mine rather strong so I didn’t quite finish the second cup.

It was really nice to have a quick chat with the other British family: the first we have seen since we got here. They were from London and had booked much of their trip with Audley as well. They recommended the Inca trail for our next adventure!

The other British family headed off to the Nijo-jo castle and we scurried between patches of shade in the other direction.

With some misgivings, after reading some reviews, we had planned a trip to the bamboo forest in Arashiyama. I did some research before we set out and plotted a course across the centre of town via the Tozai line and the San-in line to Saga-Arashiyama. My cunning plan was then to swap to another line to do one more hop that put us just outside the bamboo forest. When we got there, it became apparent that the other line was in fact the “Romantic Sagano Train Line”. This leaves every hour, is not air conditioned and had standing room only. Oh, and you have to pay for the whole trip even if you only want to go one stop. Less than ideal.

So we walked.

Hotness.

Moaning.

The bamboo forest was heaving with rude tourists. The trees were quite spaced out. The back drop was uninspiring. The bamboo forest at the Kodaiji temple was a lot better. I did try a matcha/soya ice cream. Not as good as salted caramel but edible. I was pleased that no-one else liked it as, for a change, I didn’t get pestered for another taste!

The children voted against another shrine or the monkeys- and I hadn’t even told them about the 20 minute walk to get there. I think they have a bad case of temple/shrine fatigue and not even the promise of a stamp can enthuse them when it gets to 39 degrees….again…..

We retraced our steps to the station, onto the train and back to the food market. I think this is by far our favourite place in Kyoto. We have been every day and found something new. Today it was a Japanese bookshop… the very definition of frustration! I was quite tempted by a Japanese jigsaw but the family guided me gently away.

I felt better when I found a stamp shop. There must have been 2 or 3 hundred stamps. The nice lady guided me to one that says well done in Japanese and has a picture of a samurai. I think I will use it for exceptional pieces of work!!!

I was very impressed today (although still unconvinced that it wasn’t accidental…) when Keith navigated us back through the grid of seemingly identical covered streets to the dumpling and bubble tea shop. We didn’t need any more dumplings, but there is always space for a bubble tea!

Our mission today was to try and get Danny a yukata to use as a dressing gown when we get home. We failed in the market. It seems to be a girl’s souvenir and he wasn’t keen on the silky red ones! We also failed in the shop Tim recommended. They had lots of second hand adult ones, but none that would fit Danny. Finally, having  previously learned a massive number of random adjectives in Japanese came on handy as Danny was trying one on and the sales assistant sucked air through her teeth and stated: “mijikai” which means short. Time well spent.

We eventually found a shop selling what were in effect kid’s dressing up clothes. The quality is not fantastic but hopefully a few washes will soften it up.

We had a fun time in another department store food basement buying a picnic tea as we couldn’t face a restaurant or the queue that would inevitably need to be stood in to get into one.

After tea and a little rest, the children went to read in bed and Keith and I went back out to see Kyoto at night. It was significantly cooler than it had been earlier but still very warm, well over 30 degrees. We had a little wander down a fashionable street all lit up with hanging lanterns and went back to a shrine that was heaving with people when we visited it with Lucky. It was much quieter and with a little open space and less ambient light we spotted Mars. The last time I saw it was on the Amalfi coast, on honeymoon nearly 15 years ago. Ahhh.

Thank you Kyoto and good night.

We had a planned early start today to travel to Fushima and walk up Mount Inori. A better night left us more rested but still slow to get moving, so we weren’t up and out until gone 8am. Our plan was further hampered by an accident on the Keida line leaving us stranded without a train. Like the troopers we are, we changed plan and told Google maps to find us a bus: which it did. User error meant that we got on the wrong direction so then there was a bit of a frosty atmosphere for a while. Ironically that bus service is a loop so we could have gone the other way around, but we didn’t realize that until later.

We did get to see a cormorant on the river while we waited, so every cloud…

We finally made it to the JR line and onto the Nara line, but by this point it was 10.30am and any hope of a cooler and less crowded walk had fled.

It was hot and busy at the bottom, but clearly not everyone is made of such stern stuff as us as the top was pretty quiet. It took just over an hour to ramble along under the hundreds or thousands of red gates and up the steps to the top, and we poured with sweat the whole way. It was pleasantly shaded under the trees and much cooler than on tarmac, but any kind of exertion makes your body leak all over.

Keith took hundreds of photos with annoying and impatient tourists popping a foot or head into them. I think he managed to get one or two that he liked but a lot ended up on the cutting room floor!

The way down was much quicker and we hopped on a return train just before lunch. Inari is a local stop, which means that the express doesn’t stop there. We had to go back to Kyoto station to swap to a faster train, but this meant that we could slurp ramen in air conditioning again so that was fine by us!

I braved some exciting rice crackers on the train to Nara and everyone tried the fish. Only I liked them: they were sweet and chewy, but the rest of the crackers were lovely.

Tim’s description of Nara left me a bit cold given it was an hour’s train ride away and TripAdvisor wasn’t that much more inspiring. We are obedient to the instructions however and set off on the train ride. An hour there and back in nice cool air conditioning was reason enough for me, but when we got there I was blown away.

There is a tourist loop bus that Google maps doesn’t know about (we thought we would have to walk!!!) and we hopped on that to get round to the Todai-ji temple. Just before the stop, the children noticed some of the famous Nara deer. They wander into the road with no fear at all (the deer, not the children). We managed to get off at the right bus stop and walked through the park and through the deer poo to get to the shrine (remember the poo- it features later!).

You go through a massive gate (still surrounded by inquisitive deer) and walk up to another massive building. Well, actually it is another gate, but because you can’t see through it and the tour leads you around to the left, you emerge on the other side and get slapped in the face by the size of the actual temple. Both Keith and I stood with our mouths open at the extent of it, but then it is the largest wooden building in Japan – so large as it contains the largest statue. I hope the photos do it justice. We purified as is customary and then climbed the steps. Directly in front of you is an enormous Buddha carved from wood. I think his hand would easily be taller than Keith. Either side of him are two gold covered guardian deities that would be huge in their own right.

Danny’s favourite bit was a staircase/ladder leading up to the second level. Thank God we weren’t allowed up there. Mila’s favourite bit was going to be the hollow pillar that she wriggle through, but then she found a stuffed deer that poos. Nuff said.

The views back from the temple towards the middle gate were spectacular and of course there were the requisite Koi swimming in a pond.

I was a bit depressed about the deer by this point. There were carts selling cakes that you could feed to them, but if anyone bought them they got mobbed. We saw a grandma bashing a deer on the nose as it pestered her small, screaming granddaughter who was clutching a plastic bag with a cake in it. We saw kids teasing the deer with bits of cake and then running away. All in all it felt a bit exploitative and I got a boo on and wouldn’t let the kids buy food. I also have concerns about what is in the cake?! I would like to presume it is nutritionally balanced to keep the deer healthy. They looked ok and had lots of babies.

The heat was unpleasant and our legs were tired so we hopped back on the loop bus to Nara station. Here I was allowed my first proper Japanese supermarket experience although it was rushed as we didn’t want to miss the train. We bought recognisable fruit, bento boxes for tea and various bits for breakfast tomorrow.

We did make the train even after captain worrywart declared it was impossible and then sat back to enjoy our lovely air conditioned trip.

The only exciting thing that happened on the return journey (apart from some bento box leakage) was the sight of a double decker carriage on a train going through the platform. Epic.

It was quite a relief to get back, showered and fed at a reasonable time tonight. Danny told us today that this holiday is exhausting. I think we all agree- magical with wonder everywhere, but exhausting!

I woke up this morning with bruises on my hips. This futon is more blanket than mattress. Sleep? Who needs it.

Danny’s cough is better! Hurrah.

Sweet baked goods and drinking yoghurt for breakfast and then out to the aptly name Nijo-jo Castle. Train and subway with Pasmo cards that are still functional.

It was sooo hot today and humid so it feels hard to breathe. The strength of the sun cannot be overestimated: any skin not covered up or slathered in sun cream prickles instantly and you can feel it burning.

A fascinating castle with nightingale floors that squeak as you walk across them. The rooms are full of weird representations of tigers, as though the artist had never seen a real one. Cranes, trees, etc. on beautifully detailed room sized paper screens. Gilt painted panels on ceilings undergoing restoration. No shoes, no photos inside and no air con.

Quick walk round green but hot gardens- mummy forgot the wet towels so she was in the dog house. Back out of the sun and onto the underground, then back to the food market for a very adventurous lunch; picking kebabs and nibbles from stalls: octopus, chicken, potato and cheese fishcake, followed by a kind of burger made with sliced beef between two halves of a potato croquette. All utterly yummy and easy to eat whilst walking.

Back to the house for bit of the “Grand Tour” (Amazon’ Top Gear) and a sit down to prepare for our half day walking tour this afternoon.

We met with our guide at 2pm outside the Machiya to start our tour. First stop via the local train was Sanjusangen-do Temple. This beautiful building was unaffected by 2nd World War bombing and hasn’t burnt down since the 1600s. Quite a feat for a wooden building that they still encourage people to light candles in.

It is 120m long and they still use the length outside for archery competitions: both professional and as a coming of age ceremony. Inside, there are 1,001 wooden, lacquered and gilded Buddhas. Each one is clearly built to the same pattern but each is slightly different, due to the 70 sculptors used to make them. Each face looks identical on first inspection, but the more you look the more differences you see. Each statue has 42 pairs of arms, each palm has an eye on to look out for people who need help.

Mila managed to get another stamp for her book and both children would probably tell you that their favourite part was the fan just outside blowing water onto the pathetically grateful visitors.

Our guide (whose name meant lucky books!) Then took us to have a wander round Higashiyama. It is a beautiful and clearly very old part of the city, where even Mcdonalds and Starbucks do not have enough corporate power to get full signage and ruin the atmospheric streets. She also took us to a shrine where they sell monkeys that are made from the leftover fabric from the kimono industry. The fabric did not look to meet that requirement to me, but there were lots of young people buying them and writing on them in sharpies to hang from the shrine.

Lucky explained why we have seen so many young people wearing kimono. Apparently, it is a government initiative to encourage the kimono industry and gives wearers discounts on taxis, restaurants etc. It just looks incredibly hot, but there is a huge market in having someone come to your hotel to do your hair and dress you in your rented kimono. I suppose the advantage is that you can give it back when it is sodden with sweat and stinky!

She found us a Toroto shop and we bought a key ring to add to our collection of Japanese memories. The stuffed one Mila wanted would have required its own seat on the way home!

Lucky showed us some Chinese yoof having their photos taken professionally in traditional Japanese wedding kimono on a decorative bridge. The poor boy was dressed head to toe in black and looked close to passing out. I hope their photo is good! The photographer’s camera gear wasn’t all that, either…! Lucky said that 99% of people wearing kimono and yukata in the city are in fact not Japanese at all – Chinese, Korean, and other Asian nationalities on their holidays.

She also found us an epic ice cream shop that had benches and air conditioning. Are you starting to see a theme?

Our next dose of culture was the Kodaiji Temple, built in 1605 by Toyotomi Hideyoshi’s second wife, who became a nun when he died and lived for 27 years consoling his spirit and praying to him. Maybe he didn’t have life insurance?!!! The actual building wasn’t that impressive after seeing the longest wooden structure in Japan earlier but there are 3 thatched tea ceremony buildings and a gravel garden which made our first Zen temple visit an experience nonetheless. My favourite part was the mini bamboo forest which was near the top of the hill and beautifully cool and breezy in comparison to the painfully still streets below.

The water level in the pond had sunk so low that the enormous (and apparently solitary) Koi carp didn’t fit and had to squirm along the mud in the bottom to make progress, with his dorsal fin exposed to the baking sun. My reference to microwaved salmon where a bit is cooked and the rest is not was deemed offensive.

By this time it was 5pm and the sun was sinking, rendering the temperature much more tolerable. We have used umbrellas borrowed from the Machiya for the last two days to try and protect us from the terrifying UV. Our bus stop technique is not elegant but is very effective!

We walked back to Gion through the Yasaka shrine, past rather buff young men in tight shorts pulling rickshaws full of giggling, yakata wearing girls.

Lucky told us the Japanese people see no conflict between Budhism and Shinto- using Shinto to celebrate births and weddings and Budhism to commiserate with deaths.

We had tried to book a restaurant for tonight but the one Keith wanted was completely booked up. Fortunately Lucky had a plan and led us around the warren of narrow streets. Unexpectedly we saw a Geisha and a Meiko heading off to an appointment! The Meiko can be as young as 16 and are apprentices. They can’t become full Geiko until they are 20. Lucky was very surprised to see them and we were all slightly saddened by the rash of tourists with cameras and smart phones pestering them. We stood and stared for a few seconds!

Then Lucky took us to a Teppanyaki restaurant where you could queue for your table in air conditioning sitting on chairs. Blissful.

Sat on the floor around a hot plate, the food was almost incidental but managed to be spectacular anyway- fried noodles tipped straight onto the hot plate, fried potatoes, beautiful buttered corn, steak and chicken thigh. We even had a Japanese radish salad and a big bowl of rice. Danny noticed that there were miniscule fish decorating the salad and then continued stuffing it in his face. I think we have cracked that one- he even tried the octopus at lunchtime!

Our stagger back to the Machiya included a detour to get yet more water and irritate a poor man in a sweet shop, where Keith counted out his pennies to pay for something worth 500 Yen. We had to leave quite quickly, but we had acquired some very crunchy biscuits and a rice-y peanut brittle that I would happily die for. Oh that reminds me… Danny has been hanging out for wasabi peas since we got here and today we managed to source some wasabi nuts. Very tasty, if a bit spicy, but anything that encourages us to drink can only be good.

Breakfast for tomorrow was also purchased from our favourite Familymart and includes yoghurt, fruit, sweet bread things and granola. Fish and rice would be easier to find!!

I am hoping that the double layer of mattress we have requested for tonight will leave my hips less bruised tomorrow!!